There is a lot of talk recently about resiliency; coping with anxiety and de-stressing. My question is What will actually help us? and how can we feel better in times of change and uncertainty especially as we shift to the New Normal? I’m sharing some answers with you here, so read on for simple and practical ways YOU CAN BE MORE RESILIENT RIGHT NOW.
SelfCare & Resiliency
I've been on a quest to discover ways for us to either become or remain more resilient. As the universe would have it, an event fell straight into my lap! I attended a virtual seminar with Resiliency as it’s key focus. It can be found here.
Famous women shared their tried and tested SelfCare methods that work for them. In addition, I’ve linked useful free wellbeing courses below. So it’s all here for you in one place. *Drum roll* Ladies, here are 7 gems we can use right now.
Emotional Self Check-In
The event began with Nicole Hunt, an Emotions Expert, who described a technique to use when we feel overwhelmed. She calls it RAIN which stands for Reactive Self, Accepted, Investigate, Nurturing as a way to assess our feelings.
R - Reactive Self - this is our automatic response - the emotion itself.
A - Accept it - Stress is when we want things to be different to what they are.
I - Investigate stage - Ask yourself ‘What am I believing right now?’ This disrupts old patterns.
N - Nurturing - To heal, thank your emotions for protecting you and reassure - you will be ok.
The RAIN process allows you to move through that emotional state without getting stuck.
Healthier Behaviour Habits
Ariana Huffington of Thrive Global strongly encourages micro steps that become healthier behaviour habits. She shared 3 of her personal behaviour habits:
1. Cut-off time from social media
2. Proper transition to sleep
3. Gratitude practice
Woo Hoo! Ariana and I are “Healthy Behaviour Habit Twins.” Yaasss - I’ve made it a thing because I am exactly the same!! Ariana also said that difficult times are a good opportunity to use as a portal to reimagine our lives. This allows us to kind of take stock and reconnect with a part of us that's genuinely resilient.
The Resiliency Zone
Elaine Miller Karas spoke about something we all have - a Resilience Zone. A space that keeps us buoyant. When in the low zone you can't communicate, you want to be alone and shut people out. In the high zone you are expressive, have a very heightened sense of emotion, very angry and vocal. Spending time in either zone for long periods is harmful. The high and low zones sit at the top and bottom of your Resilience Zone and the smaller your resilience zone is, the more likely you are to hit the high and low zones.
_________________
High zone
RESILIENCE
ZONE
Low zone
_________________
Things like mindfulness and journaling can help expand your resilience zone to move through experiences in a healthy way. It’s similar to what I call Encouragers, those things that help keep you afloat are important. Reflect back, what has got you through difficult times in the past, use those encouragers/tools. Do you know what yours are?
The Universe has got You
The highlight of the seminar was Rhonda Ross, the daughter of Diana Ross. I've never heard her speak before and she was mesmerizing! Her smile lit up the whole screen, you could feel her energy through the PC. Described as a Singer-Songwriter, Motivator and Actress, I loved the way she spoke about going with life's flows, emotional resilience and relaxing in the storm.
I love the idea that we can't control the storm. Rhonda spoke about a plane journey and the turbulence she experienced. She explained that she doesn't know enough about planes or wind temperature cycles to know what to do, so she's leaving it to a higher power. That higher power is the pilot. He knows better and what to do because he has the knowledge. Rhonda then compared this to life. You can’t control everything. Things are going to go wrong and things are going to go in a direction you probably didn't hope or plan for but know there's a higher power who has more knowledge than you.
Resilience - Here’s what helps me…
What was great about this seminar was the variety of speakers from different backgrounds talking about their own personal experiences and sharing nuggets of wisdom that we can actually practise and use.
The tools that have personally helped me with resilience, are acceptance because often stress is caused when you want something to be different, if you just accept it for what it is and then deal with it from there you will have already reduced a lot of the angst around whatever it is. One of my encouragers for resilience is journaling. Similar to how Cognitive Behaviour Therapy focuses on thought patterns. Journaling helps me get it all out of my head and down on paper then I can process it. What’s the narrative? What story am I telling myself at this moment? Writing it down brings clarity. Other encouragers for me are to use humour and dance to shimmy and giggle my way through. I also limit my exposure to news and social media. I always have a set routine at bedtime and gratitude is one of focuses in my Happy Looks Beautiful 321 meditation technique.
When you subscribe to the HBL mailing list using the logo below, I share a new meditation and positive affirmation with every issue as my gift for to help you with your SelfCare.
Think about what has helped you be resilient. How do you maintain resilience? What do you do? Comment below and let’s share with our HBL Family. I love to know what works for you.
CAVUHB is offering free wellbeing courses here for those who have experienced mental health and here is a pdf of what courses are on offer.
PS - Before the seminar started, we caught sight of Ariana Huffington dapping her brow unaware off camera. She did so delicately, with precision and the utmost elegant style. Unlike the bish-bash-bosh slap on a bit of powder I usually do. Hee hee! And that’s where our twinning ends hahaha!